What is it about having such intense ring nerves that I won't even try out a fun match? I attended one, and made the excuse that I was tense and Mickey was checking out by sniffing the ground and not listening to me. I knew if he did that in the ring, I would get more tense, making this not a good experience. So I just walked around the fun match area. Haven't seeked a fun match since.
What is it that we can psyche ourselves up so much that we do not move forward? I won't die in the ring. I'm not going to get physically hurt. What is the fear? Why is judgement such a major factor to us? They claim that the biggest fear in people is being rejected. Is this an inherent trait for survival? If we are not accepted, in times of danger or need, these people watching me at an obedience trial will not be there to help me? I don't really think that me performing bad in the ring is going to be the determining factor in what people do or don't do when you need their help.
What is it that I work myself up to the point I won't do something. I freeze like a deer in headlights. If I fall or do bad, haven't I heard of get up, brush the dust off and try again? Haven't I realized that I can't expect myself to be perfect the first time, second time, maybe even the third time or the several times after that? Each time however, I will get better with practice, exposure and experience.
What makes me think I'm so special that I can't make mistakes? Some of the best handlers out there had a disaster at one time or another in the ring. Like one teacher I had for another subject said, "the reason I can give you all this great advice and information is because I did all these mistakes!" If I don't get 170 or higher is it really the end of the world? Or getting lower than 190 the end of the world? I'm only going in Novice A.
Is it that I'm worried I will have to spend a lot of money just to get the first title of CD, Companion Dog? Is getting a title what this is all about? Does Mickey really care about a ribbon and a score? No, but he does care about how I react and how I feel.
Do I fear that all the people on the side lines are going to say, look at what a horrible handler she is in that ring? Why is she even in dog training or why does she think she can even train a dog? Like who really cares!!! If they really do say that, that means they are your competitor and trying to psyche you out. Don't give them the satisfaction! Does Mickey care about what other people think? No. He only cares how I feel and prefers me to be happy and relaxed. So, looking at everything here, what is more important? It is Mickey, not the people on the side lines watching. If they do snark at me, I just pretend they are snarking because they have something stuck up th eir nose. Just as I train my dog to focus on me, I need to focus on the greatest thing inthe world, those beautiful brown eyes.. He's more important than anything. Then of course I have to focus on the judge to know what I'm doing.
How about looking at the ring as an evaluation? Failing I won't loose my job, I won't loose my house, I won't loose my dog, I will just have an opportunity to learn. I need to remember to tTake each step and criteria slowly, just like you do in training. I will get there, I will get the CD only if I progress forward. The more I put mental barriers in front of me, the more I am not going to get that CD. Mickey is now 7 years old. If procrastinate even more, he will be too old to show! Then I have accomplished nothing other than training in my living room and never knowing how well I probably could have scored. I also can't keep passing dogs up year after year. I wanted to show Rubi, my Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever. I lost her in June 2008; got her in August 1997. Another great dog passed by. Jewel, my previous Malinois, I lost her in a tragic accident in 2004. I could have gotten a CD on her, but didn't. She had potential. Right now I have the dog with the most potential, Mickey. He's fabulous. He can take it and he can do it. So what am I dawdling about?
I'm reading a book, "Remembering to Breath: Inside Dog Obedience Competition" by Willard Bailey. He talks about his ring nerves and his failures. This is exactly what I need to read. I can't be so egocentric or so narrow minded that I am the only person that has ring nerves. Doesn't everyone? The difference is they are able to move forward and realize what they want in life. Willard Bailey did and wrote a book about it. So am I just really remedial to realize this? Am I still clinging on like a child that doesn't want to go out in the real world? What is my hang up for goodness sake!
Is this why I haven't been training that much either? The more I train, the more I will eventually have to get into that ring? I don't plan training. I actually love to train, but why do I not want to do it? It's kind of like getting into the shower, I hate doing it, but when I'm in the shower, I LOVE the warm water and I feel so good afterwards. Go figure! But as a side note, my training frequency has gone up. Good girl Christy, keep it coming!
To get anywhere in life, we need to get out there and get out of our comfort zone. I can criticize others for not getting out of their comfort zone, and here I am a hypocrite! For 20 years I've put barriers in front of me to get into that ring, but have dreamed about it for a very long time. Mickey should have already had his CD and CDX by now! But nope, I put barriers. I put FEAR in the way......F.E.A.R. as I learned years ago, False Evidence Appearing Real.
I need to put one foot in front of the other, make a plan, spend 2-3 minutes to train to make it short, and move forward. Can I do it, I'm here at my last hope. My last chance. It is time to move forward and get going. I will do it, here I come!
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Sunday, January 22, 2012
On the Road Again...
Yesterday, I attended another Denise Fenzi workshop with Mickey. My ups and downs of health, and trying to keep up with life have been a major factor of me not keeping on track. Of course I'm always highly critical of myself, that if I just would have practice and not use health issues as an excuse, Mickey and I would have been so much further along. Being under the weather shouldn't interfere with my training. If you can sit up, you can train. Denise joked that while I had Vertigo, lie there and train your dog. However, I could barely stand up long enough to feed the dogs, hardly fed myself. Not sure if I could have thought of what to train with my mind set. But, how do I get around this? This is what I have to figure out. Not let the barriers laugh at me and get the best of me, but figure a way out around the situation. That's what life is all about right? No one cares that you have one hurdle to get over, or even 50 more than the average person. They only see your result. That's what really counts. Did you get there? Rewarding for effort just leaves you there, just trying, not succeeding. Chewing myself out for not getting there doesn't help either. However, setting a plan and sticking to it, making a plan what to do if I'm sick, what to do if I'm dizzy, what to do if.....? I can always revert back to Debi Davis' "Training in the Loo" idea. In other words, made good use of my time.
What right is happening? I am doing some tidbits of training with Mickey, just enough to show everyone there is some improvement in us. Mickey is coming along nicely. He did some of his best heeling I've seen yesterday in this workshop. His eye contact with me held longer, which even overwhelmed me. The length we locked eyes together was a realization this boy really wants to put his heart out for me. I got the dog, now where is my part in the deal? Let's keep our locked eyes love affair going!
So what other barrier I can whine about? I need to overcome my fear of doing activities or performances in front of people. I realize I'm not the only one who has this as a challenge. I thought being a park ranger, where I am giving presentations to an average of 40 people up to 100+ visitors, would cure me. Nope. Life is managed, not cured. We can psychoanalyze, but in the mean time, I want to get where I'm going. So, focus forward to my goal. It is all about shaping behavior right? Each new environment is like starting all over again. For example, my first try giving a park ranger presentation in class, I was nervous. As I stood frozen as everyone watched me, I had the feeling of a waterfall pouring down my back as I stood frozen. I eventually was shaped, practice and worked doing better presentations to where I was fairly decent. I got over my fear of speaking in public, I certainly learned from that experience, and need to take the steps I took then, and apply it to this setting of performing with my dog. I have to remind myself "GET OVER YOURSELF!!!!" OK? Enough whining? Enough fretting on stuff that just doesn't get you ANYWHERE? OK? Over yourself now? GOOD! Now let's get to work.
Some subjects covered in the workshop:
Frozen Deer in Headlights - As I walked around the field in front of Denise, it was obvious I was focusing so hard on what to do, that I was stiff, unnatural and not being able to focus on all aspects of what I was doing. Mickey was doing his best to heel with me. What a good dog and a good sport he is! This is when Denise knew the Metronome needed to be brought out.
Metronome - I need to keep an even pace. Denise put her metronome at 120 and had me walk around the field. Everyone noticed a big difference in my walking. Prior I was heeling with Mickey and falling all over my feet, wobbling and trying to figure where I was located. With the Metronome, it keeps me focused and moving forward. It is more assertive, shows more assurance and keeps me on pace with my dog. Gives my dog better signals and allows for me to demonstrate better leadership.
Feet Work - what my feet are doing, also communicates to my dog what we are doing. When making about turns, keep feet together, it helps slow the dog and helps them know what direction then need to turn or keep with your body. Keep that straight line while turning. Keep legs together when making left or right turns. I tended to go wide.
Drifting out on right turns around figure eight - Turn left when Mickey drifts, this brings him right in. Sometimes throughout the figure eight, do left turns to make this interesting so it doesn't become to automatic. They will pay more attention to you this way.
When Judge asks "Ready?" - This is not a statement, but a question. They really are asking if you are ready to start the exercise. Most important, make sure your dog's attention is on you before you say "yes" to the judge. If not, say not yet or wait a minute, get your dog set up and say, OK, I'm ready. Don't wait for the judge to ask again. Be respectful of everyone's time, get your dog focus immediately.
As I was going through my run with Mickey and listening to Denise instructing others, I reflected on Bob Bailey's "Think, Plan, Do!" That one of my major problems is putting a training program together. Think about what I am doing, plan what I am going to do, and do it. I have the tools to succeed and have the knowledge to succeed, I need to organize myself in putting it all together and putting it into action. Organizing my time, spend less time on the computer or goofing off. I joke that I need to buy myself a computer tablet to keep me on track to tell me what to do.Hey, and I can even put a metronome on a tablet computer too. Since I goof off on a computer too much, maybe if I used a computer to keep me on track with training.
In college I use to print out my plan charts with carefully blocked off times in what I should do. Since I have gotten away from that schedule, I have drifted off into a free spirit of going with the wind. What ever happens, happens. How can I get anything done with that type of approach to succeeding with training two dogs in precision obedience? As I always remind myself, life is managed, not cured. It is like painting the Golden Gate Bridge, you start at one end, when you finish painting the whole bridge, it is time to start over, maintenance and progression on a project is something always in motion. Regardless of what I use, an old fashion hand written date book or a fancy tablet computer, the bottom line is I need to Think, Plan and Do.
What right is happening? I am doing some tidbits of training with Mickey, just enough to show everyone there is some improvement in us. Mickey is coming along nicely. He did some of his best heeling I've seen yesterday in this workshop. His eye contact with me held longer, which even overwhelmed me. The length we locked eyes together was a realization this boy really wants to put his heart out for me. I got the dog, now where is my part in the deal? Let's keep our locked eyes love affair going!
So what other barrier I can whine about? I need to overcome my fear of doing activities or performances in front of people. I realize I'm not the only one who has this as a challenge. I thought being a park ranger, where I am giving presentations to an average of 40 people up to 100+ visitors, would cure me. Nope. Life is managed, not cured. We can psychoanalyze, but in the mean time, I want to get where I'm going. So, focus forward to my goal. It is all about shaping behavior right? Each new environment is like starting all over again. For example, my first try giving a park ranger presentation in class, I was nervous. As I stood frozen as everyone watched me, I had the feeling of a waterfall pouring down my back as I stood frozen. I eventually was shaped, practice and worked doing better presentations to where I was fairly decent. I got over my fear of speaking in public, I certainly learned from that experience, and need to take the steps I took then, and apply it to this setting of performing with my dog. I have to remind myself "GET OVER YOURSELF!!!!" OK? Enough whining? Enough fretting on stuff that just doesn't get you ANYWHERE? OK? Over yourself now? GOOD! Now let's get to work.
Some subjects covered in the workshop:
Frozen Deer in Headlights - As I walked around the field in front of Denise, it was obvious I was focusing so hard on what to do, that I was stiff, unnatural and not being able to focus on all aspects of what I was doing. Mickey was doing his best to heel with me. What a good dog and a good sport he is! This is when Denise knew the Metronome needed to be brought out.
Metronome - I need to keep an even pace. Denise put her metronome at 120 and had me walk around the field. Everyone noticed a big difference in my walking. Prior I was heeling with Mickey and falling all over my feet, wobbling and trying to figure where I was located. With the Metronome, it keeps me focused and moving forward. It is more assertive, shows more assurance and keeps me on pace with my dog. Gives my dog better signals and allows for me to demonstrate better leadership.
Feet Work - what my feet are doing, also communicates to my dog what we are doing. When making about turns, keep feet together, it helps slow the dog and helps them know what direction then need to turn or keep with your body. Keep that straight line while turning. Keep legs together when making left or right turns. I tended to go wide.
Drifting out on right turns around figure eight - Turn left when Mickey drifts, this brings him right in. Sometimes throughout the figure eight, do left turns to make this interesting so it doesn't become to automatic. They will pay more attention to you this way.
When Judge asks "Ready?" - This is not a statement, but a question. They really are asking if you are ready to start the exercise. Most important, make sure your dog's attention is on you before you say "yes" to the judge. If not, say not yet or wait a minute, get your dog set up and say, OK, I'm ready. Don't wait for the judge to ask again. Be respectful of everyone's time, get your dog focus immediately.
As I was going through my run with Mickey and listening to Denise instructing others, I reflected on Bob Bailey's "Think, Plan, Do!" That one of my major problems is putting a training program together. Think about what I am doing, plan what I am going to do, and do it. I have the tools to succeed and have the knowledge to succeed, I need to organize myself in putting it all together and putting it into action. Organizing my time, spend less time on the computer or goofing off. I joke that I need to buy myself a computer tablet to keep me on track to tell me what to do.Hey, and I can even put a metronome on a tablet computer too. Since I goof off on a computer too much, maybe if I used a computer to keep me on track with training.
In college I use to print out my plan charts with carefully blocked off times in what I should do. Since I have gotten away from that schedule, I have drifted off into a free spirit of going with the wind. What ever happens, happens. How can I get anything done with that type of approach to succeeding with training two dogs in precision obedience? As I always remind myself, life is managed, not cured. It is like painting the Golden Gate Bridge, you start at one end, when you finish painting the whole bridge, it is time to start over, maintenance and progression on a project is something always in motion. Regardless of what I use, an old fashion hand written date book or a fancy tablet computer, the bottom line is I need to Think, Plan and Do.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
More on Competition Obedience training
Since last December, I have been fighting fatigue, it had turned worse the past three months. It is like fighting to keep your head above water and surviving what you can every day. I would have bursts of energy for one day, then be out for the the next two weeks. How can I have just enough energy to live life even? I had some blood test scares and working with my doctor we are working on a solution. I feel better, but not my usually bundle of energy self. But at least I'm more functional now and slowly coming back. These things just don't change over night.
I haven't been training Mickey. I would take him to a park and do a little bit, then not for a few weeks. This is not consistent enough to get anything accomplished. He also has been zoning out when I take him to parks. What is going on? I attended a workshop with Denise yesterday and it all hit me. Being fatigue sometimes means your brain just isn't engage to think out the problems you need to sort. But at least the issue came to head yesterday. In the past two sessions I went to Denise, we did use food, then this time I thought we would try his Kong. As we worked with the Kong and when he got his Kong, he paraded around like a happy boy. At that moment I was embarrassed to boot, but I knew any emotions would just prompt Mickey more into his complete silliness. More stress release for me in he knows I"m pissed, so I just didn't get pissed. Just took Denise's lead. However, he is cute when he does that, and I have worked to control this, but that control was gone yesterday. Which when you haven't done any consistent work with your dog for several months, on top of not going out and allowing him to be a silly boy, it all came clear. This poor boy hasn't played with his Kong for several months in this fashion.
I have worked with Mickey a little here, and there, but I have not taken him out to a big field to be a dog in a very long time. I have a small yard at my house. Enough to go out, feel the son, watch people pass by potty and go back in the house. No real running space. Mickey also feels pushed aside by Divine. Mickey use to be the full-time service dog, now Divine is the full-time service dog. He doesn't know what to do with himself when he sees Divine work for me.
I was balancing the two dogs well before, but when my fatigue and health issues got worse, I would come home and zone out. I had just enough energy to get out of bed, go to work since I need that pay check, then come home and crash. Forget about what my house even needs, just come home and crash. I was not spending time Mickey. He needs a lot more than a good boy and some interaction when I feed him.
When I would come home, I had no brain energy to think of the next training plan. Day in and day out, I come home from work, having spent the day with Divine, and just zoning out. Mickey is such an emotional dog, that he needs that interaction. He loves to train. When I was more consistent when I would skip a day of training, he would bop my elbow to say, let's train! He loves it. We wants to do more, strive for more and have that interaction with me he craves. But I wasn't there for him. I was emotionally, mentally and physically drained, I just couldn't give it to him. My body was on its way to internal organ damage. Days went by, weeks and then it turned to months. With an occasional outing here and there, but not sufficient to keep this specialized hot engine running smoothly. My life literally was crumbling. I wasn't even taking care of my own social needs, nor my health either. How could I take care of Mickey's social needs if I was not doing very good at taking care of myself? I was in a fight to try and get my normal life back. My blood tests were scary and what was happening was depressing to hear, however, the good news was, it can be appropriately managed to the point that I can live my life with Mickey and Divine. I can get back to the point I can handle both dogs and balance their needs.
Yesterday at the workshop with Denise, we worked on a little bit of impulse control. Denise had me put the toy on the ground. When he appropriately got into heel position, then I let him go and get the toy. I have actually done this practice before, but only at home, not with 14 pair of eyes peering at him intensely to learn about this method of using a toy to teach heeling. Mickey grabs the rope of the Kong and flips around having a good ole jolly time. Our second session, I realized then and there, wow, he hasn't done this in a long time and it is obvious he has been too deprived of it. To see him so gleefully happy actually made me smile. He certainly was not in the frame of mind to work. At this time, my brain calculating and thinking about it, ok
It was wrong for me to think he would be ready for yesterday. Friday Night I put him in his guide dog harness, hopped on the trolley and went to the Association of Pet Dog Trainer's exhibit hall. But there he was also beside himself. Just not himself and stressed in front of a bunch of dog trainers. Oh you can just feel those judgements coming right through those eyes as they saw you. Mickey hasn't been on the Trolley and worked as a guide dog for two months. Mickey finally got out into the world he use to know. What over stimulation for him! But I thought getting out like that the night before the workshop would help, but it didn't. Normally it would, but he has been so deprived. How my heart sinks when I think of this.
This puts me forward in thinking ahead. Now I need to plan. Just like my taped sessions it is all int he planning. I have gotten out of the habit of planning. When I was younger, I was a chronic planner and planned everything to the half an hour and my life seemed to hum along. Some here I just got out of the habit and crumbled. Now it is time to get back on track and habit. To have success with working with Mickey's toy in how to get him to heel. I will take Denise's advice and the previously session. We will get there again. Let's work a plan to get Mickey back into regular play, and a written plan for his training session. I have his old training journal and get back to using it. Since my brain needs to get back into shape, I need to help it along by using tools to assist me. None of this off the fly train what I feel for the day anymore. We will work on Mickey's impulse control.
So no more coming to the computer and zoning out because I have no energy. It gets me in trouble in many ways. My brain isn't coherent enough to even read the social media and when I write, I'm not in sync and get myself in trouble with other people. I fall on my face. It is addicting when you don't get out enough to socialize with other humans. I don't need a lot, just a little positive energy and I'm ok. The challenges of living alone. But it is all in the plan. I will work through this, use my blank date book and plan the time and then in Mickey's training journal, start putting training entries in again. I will get back on track. Although others at the workshop thought Mickey and I did well, I felt we took several steps back. If I had been consistently training, we would be ready for the ring right now. With the winter festivals coming up, I probably won't get to show until January or later. Mickey will be 7 years old in January. I will be lucky enough if I could get a CD on him. I was hoping to get a CDX on him. We will see.
I haven't been training Mickey. I would take him to a park and do a little bit, then not for a few weeks. This is not consistent enough to get anything accomplished. He also has been zoning out when I take him to parks. What is going on? I attended a workshop with Denise yesterday and it all hit me. Being fatigue sometimes means your brain just isn't engage to think out the problems you need to sort. But at least the issue came to head yesterday. In the past two sessions I went to Denise, we did use food, then this time I thought we would try his Kong. As we worked with the Kong and when he got his Kong, he paraded around like a happy boy. At that moment I was embarrassed to boot, but I knew any emotions would just prompt Mickey more into his complete silliness. More stress release for me in he knows I"m pissed, so I just didn't get pissed. Just took Denise's lead. However, he is cute when he does that, and I have worked to control this, but that control was gone yesterday. Which when you haven't done any consistent work with your dog for several months, on top of not going out and allowing him to be a silly boy, it all came clear. This poor boy hasn't played with his Kong for several months in this fashion.
I have worked with Mickey a little here, and there, but I have not taken him out to a big field to be a dog in a very long time. I have a small yard at my house. Enough to go out, feel the son, watch people pass by potty and go back in the house. No real running space. Mickey also feels pushed aside by Divine. Mickey use to be the full-time service dog, now Divine is the full-time service dog. He doesn't know what to do with himself when he sees Divine work for me.
I was balancing the two dogs well before, but when my fatigue and health issues got worse, I would come home and zone out. I had just enough energy to get out of bed, go to work since I need that pay check, then come home and crash. Forget about what my house even needs, just come home and crash. I was not spending time Mickey. He needs a lot more than a good boy and some interaction when I feed him.
When I would come home, I had no brain energy to think of the next training plan. Day in and day out, I come home from work, having spent the day with Divine, and just zoning out. Mickey is such an emotional dog, that he needs that interaction. He loves to train. When I was more consistent when I would skip a day of training, he would bop my elbow to say, let's train! He loves it. We wants to do more, strive for more and have that interaction with me he craves. But I wasn't there for him. I was emotionally, mentally and physically drained, I just couldn't give it to him. My body was on its way to internal organ damage. Days went by, weeks and then it turned to months. With an occasional outing here and there, but not sufficient to keep this specialized hot engine running smoothly. My life literally was crumbling. I wasn't even taking care of my own social needs, nor my health either. How could I take care of Mickey's social needs if I was not doing very good at taking care of myself? I was in a fight to try and get my normal life back. My blood tests were scary and what was happening was depressing to hear, however, the good news was, it can be appropriately managed to the point that I can live my life with Mickey and Divine. I can get back to the point I can handle both dogs and balance their needs.
Yesterday at the workshop with Denise, we worked on a little bit of impulse control. Denise had me put the toy on the ground. When he appropriately got into heel position, then I let him go and get the toy. I have actually done this practice before, but only at home, not with 14 pair of eyes peering at him intensely to learn about this method of using a toy to teach heeling. Mickey grabs the rope of the Kong and flips around having a good ole jolly time. Our second session, I realized then and there, wow, he hasn't done this in a long time and it is obvious he has been too deprived of it. To see him so gleefully happy actually made me smile. He certainly was not in the frame of mind to work. At this time, my brain calculating and thinking about it, ok
It was wrong for me to think he would be ready for yesterday. Friday Night I put him in his guide dog harness, hopped on the trolley and went to the Association of Pet Dog Trainer's exhibit hall. But there he was also beside himself. Just not himself and stressed in front of a bunch of dog trainers. Oh you can just feel those judgements coming right through those eyes as they saw you. Mickey hasn't been on the Trolley and worked as a guide dog for two months. Mickey finally got out into the world he use to know. What over stimulation for him! But I thought getting out like that the night before the workshop would help, but it didn't. Normally it would, but he has been so deprived. How my heart sinks when I think of this.
This puts me forward in thinking ahead. Now I need to plan. Just like my taped sessions it is all int he planning. I have gotten out of the habit of planning. When I was younger, I was a chronic planner and planned everything to the half an hour and my life seemed to hum along. Some here I just got out of the habit and crumbled. Now it is time to get back on track and habit. To have success with working with Mickey's toy in how to get him to heel. I will take Denise's advice and the previously session. We will get there again. Let's work a plan to get Mickey back into regular play, and a written plan for his training session. I have his old training journal and get back to using it. Since my brain needs to get back into shape, I need to help it along by using tools to assist me. None of this off the fly train what I feel for the day anymore. We will work on Mickey's impulse control.
So no more coming to the computer and zoning out because I have no energy. It gets me in trouble in many ways. My brain isn't coherent enough to even read the social media and when I write, I'm not in sync and get myself in trouble with other people. I fall on my face. It is addicting when you don't get out enough to socialize with other humans. I don't need a lot, just a little positive energy and I'm ok. The challenges of living alone. But it is all in the plan. I will work through this, use my blank date book and plan the time and then in Mickey's training journal, start putting training entries in again. I will get back on track. Although others at the workshop thought Mickey and I did well, I felt we took several steps back. If I had been consistently training, we would be ready for the ring right now. With the winter festivals coming up, I probably won't get to show until January or later. Mickey will be 7 years old in January. I will be lucky enough if I could get a CD on him. I was hoping to get a CDX on him. We will see.
Cameras, Lights, Action!
I have been fortunate to attend workshops of some of the greatest trainers and teachers of our time in the field of dog or animal training. The late 90's was when I went to a number of seminar, workshops and conferences to feed my thirst for learning about dogs. What a learning curve and I couldn't get enough. I was fortunate to attend Chicken Camp where Bob Bailey mentioned to improve your training skills, get a video camera. I did. This was back in July of 1999. This was a really nice camera. Nearly top of the line for the hobbyist who just wanted to shoot. I filmed many different things, but never filmed myself training my dogs. I had a huge phobia in watching myself on camera. Having life long ridicule of how retarded I looked, it had stuck for me for many years. Life long teasing or shunning.
In August 2011 I took a lecture from Bob Bailey to get back into the grove and get me going again. It did. I got a new camera and filmed myself training Mickey one of the behaviors that were demonstrated in the lecture. I knew I could do that. I knew Mickey hadn't done this behavior and I wanted to do it with complete shaping style. No prompting, no luring, just shaping. Just how I remembered training a chicken 12 years ago.
The seminar had a behavior where someone would shape their dog to nose the plastic drawer closed. We had audience participation, brainstorming of ideas and how to approach how to get the behavior. They were thinking targeting with a Post It note. clever idea. Instead, I wanted to see a pure shaping example.
After 12 years of training after Chicken Camp, I finally got the courage enough to video myself training.
One of the things I did not do, that we learned in the seminar was plan. After all the workshop was called Think, Plan, Do. I thought about what I wanted, but I didn't carefully plan. I didn't make sure the light was perfect for me to see well enough to catch the behaviors I needed to condition. It was a bit dim so I pulled the curtains, but it wasn't bright enough. My eyes had not adjusted and I just went for it and turned on the camera. I had rehearsed what I was going to say once, but sure enough, I stumbled during my explanation on what I was about to do. When I started to first shape, I was fumbling. Goodness, this is not good! Usually I'm much faster than this and I don't fumble. Oops. As I look at the drawer and in amidst of shaping, I realized it was a bit hazy for me to see. Slight more adjustment and I had started to get better. My adventures of learning how to train in front of a camera.
Then I realized as I was shaping Mickey, I positioned myself in the wrong place, I get up, and move in front of the drawer. Ahhh, this is much better. It didn't take long after that for Mickey to get the behavior. Was this session my usual good training? No, it wasn't. I just wanted to get through this very first video. Like putting a dolphin in a new tank to train. They are not going to do their usual great performance. This was all new for me and to get over the fear of being in front of a video was huge for me.
This was a humbling experience. Now I'm put on the other side. Having criticized many videos of other people, I was the one on stage. I now understand how the other feels and feel rather embarrassed at how I didn't really know how to critique others work in a video by not being in their shoes. Another lesson learned. The camera view and what you see while training are two completely different perspectives. It can appear that I'm not shaping or clicking at the right time, when in reality I was probably right on. The big epiphany of learning here was camera placement and where I am located is extremely important. I have a new found respect for those who do this for a living, small or large scale. There is skill and insight to knowing about the camera.
Dog trainers are an interesting bunch. They always have to give you some method to use. I did the same when I critiqued people. It is just in us to do. Now before I give any suggestion, I am in a better position to ask why someone does something, before assuming. A lot of my responses were from assuming. Dog trainers are very married to their suggestions. I did the same. Why doesn't that person do it my way? Some suggestions can be really good. Some are just opinions of how they would do something, which in many cases it may not make a difference.
I believe in the science of positive reinforcement training. I try to be as clean and scientific as possible. It is about perfecting skill and most of all perfecting mechanical skill. I do occasionally use luring. It is an important tool. I use it, then try to shape away from it as soon as possible. So my videos will show more free shaping. Again, I have to emphasize, I use luring, it is a great tool, however, I am a believer that the more you use luring, the more steps later you will have to use to wean the subject off the luring. Less thinking of the dog and less the dog will do the behavior without the dependency of the lure.
So many things to think of such as placement of food, where to give the reinforcements, timing and the consequences it creates in an exercise. I train with the idea in mind, what will I have to fix later? Tossing food on the floor is not the way I train. I don't want my carpet gooey, I don't want to take extra sessions to train my dog not to search for food while out in public. Being visually impaired and that my dogs are my service dogs, I would have to take extra steps to teach my dog not to search for food when ever they want. Tossing food does tend to create that. Yes, you can toss food but teach your dog the rules when they should and should not. I just do not want to take those extra steps. Especially when I have a a dog that is excessive with their food drive. Will I never toss food on the floor? No, there might be a time I do, but doing it all the time, does create a dog that will search on the ground. I don't want this behavior when I go into a restaurant and there were a bunch of messy kids sitting there before.
Some people think cuing the dog early into behaviors is the way to go, but I like shaping. The more I can focus on sh aping, the more keen my skills become. The more that when I use other things like luring, prompting etc. the better I can use the m minimally and at the right time. I feel that shaping is a foundation of good clean training. I think the shaping process gets the dog to figure the problem, as long as you use an extreme high rate of reinforcements.
I did the terrible mistake showing this video to other dog trainers. They saw me at my worst and judged me at my worse. Which now I'm back to not wanting to film myself again, when the purpose of this video was to get me past that hump to just doing it and not be afraid of critique. I succeeded in learning and getting over the first hump, but certainly not from the criticism that I'm so sensitive. Next time I will be more careful who sees my videos. But it has now been 3 months since I filmed myself, now I have to get over the hump of trying to do video two. Sharing it with the right people who understand and know the situation is the way to go. Those who actually have seen me in person train and those who know my training style and my focus. I plan to make a video in the next two weeks.
In August 2011 I took a lecture from Bob Bailey to get back into the grove and get me going again. It did. I got a new camera and filmed myself training Mickey one of the behaviors that were demonstrated in the lecture. I knew I could do that. I knew Mickey hadn't done this behavior and I wanted to do it with complete shaping style. No prompting, no luring, just shaping. Just how I remembered training a chicken 12 years ago.
The seminar had a behavior where someone would shape their dog to nose the plastic drawer closed. We had audience participation, brainstorming of ideas and how to approach how to get the behavior. They were thinking targeting with a Post It note. clever idea. Instead, I wanted to see a pure shaping example.
After 12 years of training after Chicken Camp, I finally got the courage enough to video myself training.
One of the things I did not do, that we learned in the seminar was plan. After all the workshop was called Think, Plan, Do. I thought about what I wanted, but I didn't carefully plan. I didn't make sure the light was perfect for me to see well enough to catch the behaviors I needed to condition. It was a bit dim so I pulled the curtains, but it wasn't bright enough. My eyes had not adjusted and I just went for it and turned on the camera. I had rehearsed what I was going to say once, but sure enough, I stumbled during my explanation on what I was about to do. When I started to first shape, I was fumbling. Goodness, this is not good! Usually I'm much faster than this and I don't fumble. Oops. As I look at the drawer and in amidst of shaping, I realized it was a bit hazy for me to see. Slight more adjustment and I had started to get better. My adventures of learning how to train in front of a camera.
Then I realized as I was shaping Mickey, I positioned myself in the wrong place, I get up, and move in front of the drawer. Ahhh, this is much better. It didn't take long after that for Mickey to get the behavior. Was this session my usual good training? No, it wasn't. I just wanted to get through this very first video. Like putting a dolphin in a new tank to train. They are not going to do their usual great performance. This was all new for me and to get over the fear of being in front of a video was huge for me.
This was a humbling experience. Now I'm put on the other side. Having criticized many videos of other people, I was the one on stage. I now understand how the other feels and feel rather embarrassed at how I didn't really know how to critique others work in a video by not being in their shoes. Another lesson learned. The camera view and what you see while training are two completely different perspectives. It can appear that I'm not shaping or clicking at the right time, when in reality I was probably right on. The big epiphany of learning here was camera placement and where I am located is extremely important. I have a new found respect for those who do this for a living, small or large scale. There is skill and insight to knowing about the camera.
Dog trainers are an interesting bunch. They always have to give you some method to use. I did the same when I critiqued people. It is just in us to do. Now before I give any suggestion, I am in a better position to ask why someone does something, before assuming. A lot of my responses were from assuming. Dog trainers are very married to their suggestions. I did the same. Why doesn't that person do it my way? Some suggestions can be really good. Some are just opinions of how they would do something, which in many cases it may not make a difference.
I believe in the science of positive reinforcement training. I try to be as clean and scientific as possible. It is about perfecting skill and most of all perfecting mechanical skill. I do occasionally use luring. It is an important tool. I use it, then try to shape away from it as soon as possible. So my videos will show more free shaping. Again, I have to emphasize, I use luring, it is a great tool, however, I am a believer that the more you use luring, the more steps later you will have to use to wean the subject off the luring. Less thinking of the dog and less the dog will do the behavior without the dependency of the lure.
So many things to think of such as placement of food, where to give the reinforcements, timing and the consequences it creates in an exercise. I train with the idea in mind, what will I have to fix later? Tossing food on the floor is not the way I train. I don't want my carpet gooey, I don't want to take extra sessions to train my dog not to search for food while out in public. Being visually impaired and that my dogs are my service dogs, I would have to take extra steps to teach my dog not to search for food when ever they want. Tossing food does tend to create that. Yes, you can toss food but teach your dog the rules when they should and should not. I just do not want to take those extra steps. Especially when I have a a dog that is excessive with their food drive. Will I never toss food on the floor? No, there might be a time I do, but doing it all the time, does create a dog that will search on the ground. I don't want this behavior when I go into a restaurant and there were a bunch of messy kids sitting there before.
Some people think cuing the dog early into behaviors is the way to go, but I like shaping. The more I can focus on sh aping, the more keen my skills become. The more that when I use other things like luring, prompting etc. the better I can use the m minimally and at the right time. I feel that shaping is a foundation of good clean training. I think the shaping process gets the dog to figure the problem, as long as you use an extreme high rate of reinforcements.
I did the terrible mistake showing this video to other dog trainers. They saw me at my worst and judged me at my worse. Which now I'm back to not wanting to film myself again, when the purpose of this video was to get me past that hump to just doing it and not be afraid of critique. I succeeded in learning and getting over the first hump, but certainly not from the criticism that I'm so sensitive. Next time I will be more careful who sees my videos. But it has now been 3 months since I filmed myself, now I have to get over the hump of trying to do video two. Sharing it with the right people who understand and know the situation is the way to go. Those who actually have seen me in person train and those who know my training style and my focus. I plan to make a video in the next two weeks.
Monday, September 12, 2011
A little slip
Over a month ago, I finally took the plunge and video taped myself training Mickey. It was a behavior that was done at the Bob Bailey and Terry Long seminar in Anaheim last month. Close a drawer. After the long song and dance from Bob to plan, I actually didn't. I was so preoccupied to video tape myself, I didn't do a good job planning. The video was more to just do it. So that is its quality. I just did it.
This past weekend I went on a dog training meet-up and one thing that was evident was Mickey and I are not in sync as we have been. It was good to have other dog friends notice this. A reality check that Mickey and I have not been working that much together. We were doing so well, and this little slip is a little depressing, but keep focused forward and we will get bacy in sync again.
I have had some bouts of anemia, low iron, low Vitamin D and low Calcium. I also had extreme high triglycerides peaking at 1173. My doctor says I should be 150. My cholestrol hit 363.
I need to get my health back together, and I'm sure I will have more energy to train. I have been feeling rather fatigue and no wonder with all those low values and the high triglycerides. Time to take care of myself and cuddle with Mickey. I someone feel a little defeated, wondering when I will get into the obedience competition ring. Take one day at a time and one focus at a time. Hopefully I will have my energy back. Then get back on track with training, video taping and following good focus for training.
This past weekend I went on a dog training meet-up and one thing that was evident was Mickey and I are not in sync as we have been. It was good to have other dog friends notice this. A reality check that Mickey and I have not been working that much together. We were doing so well, and this little slip is a little depressing, but keep focused forward and we will get bacy in sync again.
I have had some bouts of anemia, low iron, low Vitamin D and low Calcium. I also had extreme high triglycerides peaking at 1173. My doctor says I should be 150. My cholestrol hit 363.
I need to get my health back together, and I'm sure I will have more energy to train. I have been feeling rather fatigue and no wonder with all those low values and the high triglycerides. Time to take care of myself and cuddle with Mickey. I someone feel a little defeated, wondering when I will get into the obedience competition ring. Take one day at a time and one focus at a time. Hopefully I will have my energy back. Then get back on track with training, video taping and following good focus for training.
Monday, July 4, 2011
Don't stop training!
There is always going to be something that just gets in the way of you moving forward. You get busy in life, its too hot, too cold. or you don't feel like it. The past few weeks I haven't done any heeling exercises because I pulled my calf muscle. I've been pulling my calf muscle for over 25 years, so the tissue there is scarred and weak.I have to be careful because stretching the muscle actually puts a strain where it is more proned to injuring the muscle again.
The main reason why I stopped doing dog agility was consistently pulling my calf muscle. In agility you are running, then do a quick stop, the turns, and the burst of runs all put strain on that weak scarred muscle. One time I pulled the muscle in an agility practice it literally felt like someone took a sling shot, and snapped it on my calf with as much pulled back force as possible. I had to have people help me walk off the field. Then a few years later my vision had started to deteriorate and I took a good nasty fall that I sprained my ankle. This took about three months to heal. I figured that I should start getting into another dog sport, like agility. I certainly wouldn't be as prone to injuries. So I thought.
Nearly four weeks ago I was practicing heeling with Mickey. I wanted to see how he would do in a fast walk, since this is required in the competition ring. I burst forward to get Mickey in a trot and felt that little zing in my leg and felt the tenderness in my calf muscle. I didn't hurt it bad, but enough that I had to favor that leg. Then a week later for no reason at all, just walking, not even doing heeling, I pulled the muscle. Since then I haven't been able to practice heeling. I tried at one park, but hurt that muscle again. I need to be careful and allow the muscle to heel completely before I can go back to my activities of heeling again.
How I so desire to practicing heeling. It isn't that strenuous of an activity, but with my calf muscle injured, and if I try to do heeling exercises, I will just injure myself again. Even if I think I'm doing OK and try to sneak a practice in, like I did two weeks ago, I got into the zone with Mickey, didn't pay attention to my leg and there was that ZAP of pain again. Sigh. There must be away to practice.
So how do I practice so I won't loose valuable training time? What can I do? There must be some foundation I can build to continue to train. Oh the beauty of problem solving. There is always something to figure out.
I can still stand which will allow me to perfect heeling in position. I can also do one step sideways, turn in a circle in one place clock-wise or counter-clock wise and even move in a square dance type fashion. I can take one step forward or one step back. All these movements are still like Dancing with Mickey. These movements can allow me to train, until my leg heals. This is very similar to the platform training I described earlier. Although it is not like heeling walking forward, it will enable Mickey to watch my movements and move with me. Similar to my canine freestyle training I have done. Eventually we do left turns, right turns and about turns in the ring. These exercises while my leg heels are perfect for position training.
Each small movement I do, I set the criteria of Mickey's position. I use high value treats or his toy. He's in the game, we are training again.
The main reason why I stopped doing dog agility was consistently pulling my calf muscle. In agility you are running, then do a quick stop, the turns, and the burst of runs all put strain on that weak scarred muscle. One time I pulled the muscle in an agility practice it literally felt like someone took a sling shot, and snapped it on my calf with as much pulled back force as possible. I had to have people help me walk off the field. Then a few years later my vision had started to deteriorate and I took a good nasty fall that I sprained my ankle. This took about three months to heal. I figured that I should start getting into another dog sport, like agility. I certainly wouldn't be as prone to injuries. So I thought.
Nearly four weeks ago I was practicing heeling with Mickey. I wanted to see how he would do in a fast walk, since this is required in the competition ring. I burst forward to get Mickey in a trot and felt that little zing in my leg and felt the tenderness in my calf muscle. I didn't hurt it bad, but enough that I had to favor that leg. Then a week later for no reason at all, just walking, not even doing heeling, I pulled the muscle. Since then I haven't been able to practice heeling. I tried at one park, but hurt that muscle again. I need to be careful and allow the muscle to heel completely before I can go back to my activities of heeling again.
How I so desire to practicing heeling. It isn't that strenuous of an activity, but with my calf muscle injured, and if I try to do heeling exercises, I will just injure myself again. Even if I think I'm doing OK and try to sneak a practice in, like I did two weeks ago, I got into the zone with Mickey, didn't pay attention to my leg and there was that ZAP of pain again. Sigh. There must be away to practice.
So how do I practice so I won't loose valuable training time? What can I do? There must be some foundation I can build to continue to train. Oh the beauty of problem solving. There is always something to figure out.
I can still stand which will allow me to perfect heeling in position. I can also do one step sideways, turn in a circle in one place clock-wise or counter-clock wise and even move in a square dance type fashion. I can take one step forward or one step back. All these movements are still like Dancing with Mickey. These movements can allow me to train, until my leg heals. This is very similar to the platform training I described earlier. Although it is not like heeling walking forward, it will enable Mickey to watch my movements and move with me. Similar to my canine freestyle training I have done. Eventually we do left turns, right turns and about turns in the ring. These exercises while my leg heels are perfect for position training.
Each small movement I do, I set the criteria of Mickey's position. I use high value treats or his toy. He's in the game, we are training again.
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Another Step towards the ring
One of the most difficult things for me to remember is, keeping your focus on the goal. WHen we loose sight of that, then we start messing up and everything falls to pieces. Forget about criticizing yourself. Go back to your focus on the goal. That solves the problem.
Today I went to a Show 'N Go. I was encouraged to enter Mickey by a few friends. When I first got there I did shy away, and watched the ring for a little bit. I also asked some questions. Then I brought Mickey out. Still didn't want to enter. Of course I could criticizing myself for my not wanting to enter at that moment. But this day wasn't a breaking point or a pivital moment in my life. It was just another step in my journey.
When I brought Mickey out, I realized I haven't had him at a park in a long time. He was highly distracted, wanting to smell every marking from dogs that have passed by the various bushes. Mickey was leaning and pulling towards the plants with some good tension, hoping to reach to get a more intimate sniff of what was left behind. Ok, we have some work to do.
I walked over to the area where they were having the event, Mickey was still distracted and not really wanting to stay with reasonable loose lead walking. Hmmm, again, it has been awhile and we are rusty. We had a good workshop session a few weeks ago but only one dog was brought out at one time. Less distraction. We did some nice heeling.
I watched, but was distracted myself. I decided that I should drop the criteria and work on him looking at me without trying to cue him. Cuing can sometimes turn into nagging if they are too distracted. That's not goo, so I let him look to me and when he did, he got the reinforcements. This will make of a low stress day. In fact, get him condition that obedience trials are no big deal. Since I realized he was distracted and if I went into that ring and gave a cue, there was a high probability he wouldn't take it. Not good, let's not entry, we can do this slow. Do this right, do this reasonable. Let's start hitting as many fun trials and parks as possible and then enter a Show 'N Go.
I actually saw some stressed people there tense from their dog not taking the command. I saw the tension in the person and it went right to the dog that then responded by sulking, sniffing becoming a statue. Be careful Christy not to get into that trap. Remember your journey. Make this fun for Mickey, make this low stress for Mickey. That's the goal more than getting ribbons, and titles. Focus on reinforcements and that is what I did. I get lost in the relationship with Mickey. I get lost in the science of the training. Its not emotional. With a Belgian, they feel emotions and I need good emotions while trialing.
I also have to keep positive thoughts for myself as well. I don't have to criticize myself and say, "I wimped out today! I should have entered to get myself going!" So I didn't enter today, so what. It wasn't a crucial pivitol moment. The appropriate thing is pat myself on the back and know that I was smart. I knew I would get tense because Mickey was distracted and I cannot afford that for the first time in the ring wtih Mickey. We do not want to develop a bad association. We work on dog's behaviors and humans behavior in sync and tandem. Push yourself too fast and that is like tripping on a bunch of scattered boxes. You have to pick yourself up and put the boxes back.
What to work on now? More sessions with shaping heeling. Think of my criteria and break it down carefully. Change criteria at the right increment, pace and momentum. Remember my goal, is to make this a non-stress environment. Allow for positive associations. It isn't about the ribbon or the title, although that is a goal. Getting mentally lost in the science keeps stress level down. It allows for problem solving with no emotions and a better path in moving forward. No room on the criteria page for criticizing myself. Also don't forget your shoulders and keep them straight and level.
We are moving forward. Planning the next park to practice!
Today I went to a Show 'N Go. I was encouraged to enter Mickey by a few friends. When I first got there I did shy away, and watched the ring for a little bit. I also asked some questions. Then I brought Mickey out. Still didn't want to enter. Of course I could criticizing myself for my not wanting to enter at that moment. But this day wasn't a breaking point or a pivital moment in my life. It was just another step in my journey.
When I brought Mickey out, I realized I haven't had him at a park in a long time. He was highly distracted, wanting to smell every marking from dogs that have passed by the various bushes. Mickey was leaning and pulling towards the plants with some good tension, hoping to reach to get a more intimate sniff of what was left behind. Ok, we have some work to do.
I walked over to the area where they were having the event, Mickey was still distracted and not really wanting to stay with reasonable loose lead walking. Hmmm, again, it has been awhile and we are rusty. We had a good workshop session a few weeks ago but only one dog was brought out at one time. Less distraction. We did some nice heeling.
I watched, but was distracted myself. I decided that I should drop the criteria and work on him looking at me without trying to cue him. Cuing can sometimes turn into nagging if they are too distracted. That's not goo, so I let him look to me and when he did, he got the reinforcements. This will make of a low stress day. In fact, get him condition that obedience trials are no big deal. Since I realized he was distracted and if I went into that ring and gave a cue, there was a high probability he wouldn't take it. Not good, let's not entry, we can do this slow. Do this right, do this reasonable. Let's start hitting as many fun trials and parks as possible and then enter a Show 'N Go.
I actually saw some stressed people there tense from their dog not taking the command. I saw the tension in the person and it went right to the dog that then responded by sulking, sniffing becoming a statue. Be careful Christy not to get into that trap. Remember your journey. Make this fun for Mickey, make this low stress for Mickey. That's the goal more than getting ribbons, and titles. Focus on reinforcements and that is what I did. I get lost in the relationship with Mickey. I get lost in the science of the training. Its not emotional. With a Belgian, they feel emotions and I need good emotions while trialing.
I also have to keep positive thoughts for myself as well. I don't have to criticize myself and say, "I wimped out today! I should have entered to get myself going!" So I didn't enter today, so what. It wasn't a crucial pivitol moment. The appropriate thing is pat myself on the back and know that I was smart. I knew I would get tense because Mickey was distracted and I cannot afford that for the first time in the ring wtih Mickey. We do not want to develop a bad association. We work on dog's behaviors and humans behavior in sync and tandem. Push yourself too fast and that is like tripping on a bunch of scattered boxes. You have to pick yourself up and put the boxes back.
What to work on now? More sessions with shaping heeling. Think of my criteria and break it down carefully. Change criteria at the right increment, pace and momentum. Remember my goal, is to make this a non-stress environment. Allow for positive associations. It isn't about the ribbon or the title, although that is a goal. Getting mentally lost in the science keeps stress level down. It allows for problem solving with no emotions and a better path in moving forward. No room on the criteria page for criticizing myself. Also don't forget your shoulders and keep them straight and level.
We are moving forward. Planning the next park to practice!
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